Football. Oh Dear.

I must be the only guy in the UK who isn't a particular fan of footie.

There, I've said it.

In fact I think her indoors knows more about football than me.

I have no idea of players (unless they've just played for England), teams, nothing.

Thats not to say I wasn't good at football myself, back in the day I even had a trial for Wimbledon FC.

Granted they told me to sod off as I was crap, but that's not the point.

My contribution to my estate based kick-abouts was 5-a-side matches, mainly due to the smaller pitches where you could kick it against walls usually which was great for my lazy self.

I do, however when asked, say my team is Millwall (yes you can laugh now) as they were my local team growing up. Ask me who plays for them, and I have no idea.

But its a man thing to at least act as if you know about football, or you get seen as a bit girlie.

I don't own any footie shirts, except an England mock shirt which has "Sea Lions on a Shirt" instead of the 3 Lions.

I don't see how I can actively support a team who always has an excuse for not winning. I can't understand why Rooney, James, Carragher or Lampard (cheers Love) can't just say " Sorry nation, we were crap."

Instead, there was, amongst other excuses this time:





The Ball. It was too round.

How can a ball be too round? Granted if it had of been square, maybe the original goalie bloke wouldn't have dropped it, but I can't see it being playable.

The Refs were biased

How can all Refs be biased against England? I know we annoy some countries but not every country. Its not Eurovision.

It was too Hot/Too Cold

We live in a country that can be blisteringly hot one minute then arctic the next. What a load of crap!

The VuVuzelas

So, what was their excuse when we hosted the Euro in 1996 (again, cheers Love) when every ten seconds a marching band would belt out Great Escape. You didn't see Portugal have any issues when they beat a not very good team 7-0.


Yes, I don't get it.

And all the players are near on as old as me. How can they sprint around the pitch when they are the footballer equivalent of getting a bus pass?

If we win in my lifetime (unlikely) I may change my mind!

Final thought:

I'm Irish, England not winning doesn't really bother me.

Just don't get me started on Thierry Henry's Hands.